Mainly I thought about the last three years. This time three years ago, I was getting ready to start at Leeds University in September. I was all excited about going to uni, meeting new people. Then I saw a person I already knew, just in a different light. We got closer, we fell in love. My whole plan changed dramatically and next thing I knew I was starting uni at Liverpool, new boyfriend by my side. The memory's so clear in my head it seems like such a short time ago, certainely not three years.
I still marvel to this day about ... people meeting for the first time, or even just dating. How does that transition happen? I mean, I know the first time I laid eyes on Jake, the first time I spoke to him, even the first time I kissed him, I would never, ever have called that three years on we'd be living in our own flat together? Definetly not. I guess what I'm trying to say is life often turns out in ways we don't expect. I still struggle sometimes with grasping how my life has turned out. Not in a bad way, just curious. I've gone through changes more in the past three years than really the rest of my life.
New friends obviously being a major. University is a sure fire way to meet new people. Some people I've met have become my best friends. Others, came and went. I think when your forced to live with strangers, it doesn't always work out. You try hard at first to get on, but eventually you realise forcing something rather than letting it happen naturally isn't a good way for things to happen. We become friends with people we're attracted to be friends with. I've left that chapter having had a fair number of fall-outs, but more importantly, meeting some people who I really hope will remain in my life for good.
That's another thing that blows my mind ... friendship. Bar one, consistent through life from primary school to adulthood friend, my first best friends were high school years; and thinking back I would genuinely think back then - 'we will be friends forever'. That sounds awfully corny but it was true. They felt like my sisters. I don't speak to them now. Life just separated us. But then other people I barely knew at that time have become the new people I want in my life 'forever' ... or at least for the long term forseeable future. I mean thinking about it I didn't even know Charlotte this time last year. I might have heard her name down the grapevine or seen Facebook wallposts on mutual friends, but I didn't know her. I certainley didn't expect to end up flatmates - and very contented, happy flatmates.
Life just is.... one big surprise. Full of changes. It used to be something I've always dreaded. Change. If I'm content then why do things have to have to change? But then, the more I think about it, I was content in high school. I DID have great friends who I had great times with. But now? I'm more than content. I'm happy. I have an amazing boyfriend, amazing friends who I just have... the best times with. I didn't think I wanted to leave uni but ... I'm really enjoying 'real world' life. And yeah, eventually, the change will happen that won't be good, things can't keep getting better forever. But I guess the expression 'life is like a rollercoaster' is true. Things get better (the roller coaster goes up) ... but you're frightened because you know the drops coming. But after the drop comes the adrenaline rush. And let's me honest.... a flat rollercoaster would get boring. The loops make life more interesting.
Just maybe not... THIS many.
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