Most people have a plan in life. They go to university to do a topic they can later in life get a job with. I used to have a plan. I don’t anymore. So I went to a career guidance counsellor. The first question she asked after what course I was doing is ‘What are you good at?”


This is such a hard question, needlessly open-ended. What am I good at? I’m good at lots of things. I’m good at spending money, drinking copious amounts of cider, I’m good at making cheesecake and roast dinners, I’ve been told I’m good in bed, and I know I’m good at being a girlfriend. I’m good at procrastination, good at texting people back, and really good at shopping, particularly finding bargins. I’m very good at falling asleep in any location, and I excel at eating chocolate, as well as making cups of tea. I’m good at various video games, and guessing the end in films. I’m good at injuring myself. I’ve also recently discovered I’m good at writing CV’s for people. Though recruitment isn’t my forte.

All of these things then I figured not to mention, they aren’t useful skills in jobs.

“I’m good at listening, and I give good advice.” I offered. This is true, and potentially helpful.

“Have you considered counselling?”

Fuck you.

“Yes actually. That was my life’s ambition. Unfortunately I won’t consider the extra 5 years I have to spend in uni to do it.”

“So what else are you good at?”

Romance, couples, love, matchmaking. Would it be valid to mention these? I’m brilliant at all things love. I’m usually good at setting people up because I know what traits work together, and who would clash. I’m also good at telling when couples aren’t right for each other. I could probably tell you now out of people in my life which couples will go the distance and which won’t. There’s so many indicators, it can be the smallest things, a minor action, a look in the eyes. The way they move around each other. Couples who work are the ones that co-exist. Sometimes it not obvious, they seem strong and loved up but there’s just a sign they’re not right. Other times its staring you in the face, they’re bad mouthing there other half, flirting with anything that has a pulse around them, wandering eyes. And breaking up. The couples that break up a lot and then get back together then think it’s all so romantic they came back together. No. Once, maybe. But this happens every month, you obviously aren’t right for each other if you were so easily ready to give up. And the fact this keeps happening just shows you aren’t right for each other, so break it up and move on.

I can’t really say this to my guidance counsellor however and I’m aware there’s limited jobs that require it. Maybe I could work at match.com pairing people up... or well, relationship counselling would be ideal. But again, five years... just no.

Instead I offer, “I’m good at reading people.” This falls under similar topics since you need to be able to read people to watch a relationship anyway. “I can usually tell if a person’s good or bad just by looking at them.”
At this point I get the raised eyebrows expression I often get when the ‘good/bad person’ statement comes up.

I have this theory you see, there are two types of people. Good people and bad people. At the end of the day, whichever type you are you will make mistakes. At some point or another you’ll cock up massively whether it’s being a shit friend, lying about something, just do something bad. Because people aren’t perfect, we all fuck up. Every single one of us. The difference is. Good people are the ones who fuck up but feel remorse for it. They try and be nice and good and there for people, but occasionally they fail but they take it damn hard. Bad people however are those who don’t care. They’ll act like a dick and chances are they’ll think they’re hilarious and the best thing since sliced bread. Don’t get me wrong it’s not just black and white. There are grey areas and varying degrees. But generally I can tell what sort of person people are by a glance and I’m very rarely wrong.


I’ve explained this to the counsellor now avoiding describing the bad people are acting like ‘cunts’ as I figure this won’t go down well. The counsellors got this weird expression on her face like I might be a nutter. Maybe she’s right. But then she surprises me by sitting back in her chair, arms folded and says, “And which are you?”
“Me? I’m a good person.” Of course I’m going to say that anyway because I’m hardly going to tell someone I’m a massive twat whether it’s true or not, but yeah lets’ get serious for a moment. “I try to be a nice person, my friends will know this, if they want something, ask and it’s done. I help anyone I care about in any way I can because I feel nothing but gratitude for them being in my life. Going all out, going the extra mile.... it’s my way of saying thank you for being in my life. That being said, if someone hurts someone I care about I get aggressive about it, I’m more likely to throw a punch over a friend being upset than I am myself. She smiles and nods and says ‘Raskha’ to me. I look at her blankly until she explains ... 'Mother wolf' ...  raskha means protection, ‘she will fight to the death for any of her cubs, natural or adopted’.
This woman is obviously smarter than she looks because she’s read me pretty well. She tells me that she doesn’t know what job to suggest, but the good people always come out on top, “You’ll be just fine.”

... I still don't know what I'm going with my life... but at least I know what my next tattoo is going to say :)

THAILAND


So home from Thailand and what an amazing two weeks it was. Following 14 hours of travelling, 7 hours to Doha, and hour stop over and then a 6 hour flight Doha to Bangkok, I was exhausted but excitable. I slept in the taxi from Bangkok to Pattaya but by the time we reached the hotel I just wanted to explore.

Grand Mirage Hotel

 

Balcony view of hotel grounds

The first night we explored the ‘easy-going’ nightlife, Soi 7 and Soi 8. Roads composed entirely of bars, tightly compact, as many as 8 bars under on single roof. It really is something to take in – a Wednesday night and the place was as busy as Concert Square on a Saturday. But in Thailand, every night is a Saturday. They don’t do ‘weekends’. There nightlife doesn’t stop. Bargirls chant as you walk past trying to coax you into their bar. Street sellers wander up to you with everything imaginable, it’s not just your usual watches and jarg DVD’s holiday crap, anything you could want to buy they have; clothes, nice shoes, all sorts. Everywhere you look there’s motorbikes with barbeque sidecars... cooking chicken, pork, sausages, fresh fish squid, chopping up fresh fruit.. 10 baht for anything (about 20p).

The bar girls are wonderful friendly too, they play games, Connect 4 and Jenga. On our second night we played with a girl for hours, she had some alternate versions of Jenga that proved fun, especially when drunk. Hello new drinking games for home. At that point we experienced men walking up to you in bars with snakes, big pythons wrapped around there shoulders. And lemurs, the first time I saw a lemur I thought from the way it was being held; wrapped in a blanket being cradled that it was a small, ugly child. Many of the bars had bands too, asking for volunteers to get up. Of course this is Jake’s niche and he often got up for performances. Which sent the Thai people insane. They obviously enjoy 80’s rock because they were stamping their feet screaming for more

 Soi 7 and 8 are as well, like I said, the ‘easy going’ nightlife. There’s Soi 6, - which is lady boy central. An example of some of the names of Soi 6 bars; Big Batty Boom Bar, Willies Hang Out Bar. It becomes a game to spot them, and it’s usually an easy game. Then there’s Walking Street. The closest thing I can thing to compare it to is Las Vegas. Bright neon signs, miles long packed bars and clubs; all blasting music with girls outside grabbing you to try and get you to come to their bar. We took refuge in the Revolving Bar, a bar that literally revolves around as you sit. Fun but if you’re drunk it results in the worst case of spinnies I’ve ever had.

The days were action packed too. Our hotel wasn't far from the main stretch; Beach Road - an 8 mile long road stretching along the coast filled with shops, restaurants and tattoo and massage parlours. Massages is something we had a lot of, full body oil massage for £6. Authenic thai massage, £4. Hot stone massage, £6. Pampering at its best, and cheapest. We tried out the foot spa, they're not exclusive to Thailand but over here its a £10 for 10 minutes, there it was £2.50 for 20 minutes.

One day we took a trip to the Elephant park, riding Elephants through the park followed by a show where Elephants played ball games, painted pictures and danced. It was definetly an experience to see.

 

Another day we went out to one of the islands - a 20 minute speed boat ride off the main coast of Pattaya to a beautiful island. White sandy beaches, palm trees, turquoise ocean. Absolute paradise. We went on a Banana Boat which given my history of accidents perhaps in retrospect wasn't the brightest idea. On our final ride I flew off the boat forwards rather than sideways. I landed in the water infront of the banana and it hit me in the head. I ended up with a concussion, a bloody lip and some grazes. I recovered quick however and within an hour we had taken a motorbike up the mountain through dirtroads to a shooting range where I got my first experience of shooting a gun. Surprisingly fun, though I witnesses someone nearly dislocate their arm choosing to fire a shotgun so I thought it best to avoid that.

While this is a very brief sum up of the holiday; hopefully it should give a good idea of what Thailand was like. Beautiful hotels, beautiful islands, beautiful prices. I haven't even covered my 21st. It was amazing though, I got very spoilt; dozens of roses, beautiful jewellry, gorgeous canvas paintings, a new tattoo - and thats just the presents, the night was a bar hired out with my own private band playing (Jake got up himself of course). A buffet with a spit-roast pig (incidently the most gorgeous pork I've ever tasted). The bar girls decorated with hundreds of balloons, a massive banner and a cake for me. It was simply amazing, and definetly a memorable 21st.

 

I’ve been back in England a day.... exactly 24 hours; and already I feel stressed and sick. University is getting me down, the results from recent assignments aren’t fantastic, they’re dragging my whole average down and at this point I think getting a 2:1 might be a struggle. Never mind a 1st. Not to mention the fact I still don’t know what I want to do afterwards. Nothing appeals to me other than Counselling but then that’s just too much extra time in education.




Thailand was outstanding. It’s just a different world out there, a parallel universe, that I loved. And I felt, healthy over there. No back pain, no feeling sick all the time. I felt a little tired but I put that down to jetlag and activity filled days. I just felt generally better in myself though. I didn’t even faint with the heat which is a massive positive to me; it was something I’d been worrying about for a while prior to going. Got a nice colour, my nails grew miraculously fast. I just felt good. So much so it’s becoming a possible option that I’m really considering going there more permanently. Condo’s and houses are cheap enough that in reality I could afford one after a year’s work. I’m not sure exactly what I’d do over there, maybe teach English. If I learnt Thai I could probably easily open my own counselling practice. I could definitely do my writing there, I think the place would be inspiring. Where better to write a novel than a white sandy beach with palm trees overlooking an expanse of turquoise. I know as well, before we met up it was Jake’s plan anyway, so he wouldn’t object. The only people I can think of who would are my parents, but nothings new there.

Anyway I need to go back to revision now, *sigh* ... I miss relaxed, laid-back paradise. I will do a proper Thailand blog later though :)