So lots has happened since my last update. Results are in and I passed everything so I'm happy about that. I've started getting really into my dissertation topic aswell, sleep is actually so interesting so I'm glad I'm taking a module on it next year. Its also sparked my wish to definetly go about learning hypnosis as an alternative therapy. Though I'm trying to find a place that does that that does not involve spending a year in London because 1. I don't want to leave Jake. 2. I don't want to leave Liverpool in general. 3. London is expensive as!

This weekend was the Liverpool Tattoo Convention, which has got me so wanting another piece of ink. I've decided its definetly going to be a swallow but design wise I can't decide which ones I like! I can't choose between like a more simple outline or the traditional old school one. Hmmm!!

The convention itself was really good though, Jake ended up getting more of his arm done by his regular artist. She's such a nice down-to-Earth person think I'll end up going to her myself to be honest!

Then today I finally had my Rock Chic shoot. This had been delayed over and over for stupid reasons so I was beginning to think the whole thing was cursed. But no it ended up being really good, mad hair and makeup for it. It was the first shoot I've ever been too where they had music playing too so that was fun. Hopefully will be getting the pics soon so watch this space for them :)

A few blog posts back I wrote a list of things to achieve. This is just gonna look back on them now and see how far I've gotten in actually accomplishing any of it.



3. Get a new job I actually enjoy.

Ok its not the most steady job in the world but I managed to get a modelling gig. Its working for a promotional thing called "Rock Chic" aimed at encouraging more girls to play guitars. The woman organising it is, older admittedly but really fun and cool and young at spirit so I get along well with her. I haven't done a shoot yet but I think its something I'm going to enjoy doing. As an added bonus I think Jake will like it too.

5. Decorate a room.

Even though I intend to move out in a couple of months, I'm very bored of my bedroom at home. Its become less of a home for me and more of well, I suppose it looks like an attic. A random assortment of posessions strewn all over the place. I think I need to clear out a lot of my stuff, much of it I don't know why I keep because its junk. And many of it holds bad memories. Well, I suppose good memories; just of people I no longer speak to. Anyway .... a cream room with one bold red wall behind the bed I think will be more modern, and older.
7. Organise my wardrobe/drawers.

This was one of the first things I did when I came home from university. Emptied my wardrobe and drawers onto the bed and just looked at all the clothes there. There was literally hundreds. I kept most of my dresses, just because I have a particular fondness for pretty much all of them. I was more ruthless with the rest though, there were tops in there I've been wearing since I was 14. They went. Things that were gorgeous that didn't fit anymore, things that did fit but I never really wear. I emptied them out, and the space it made is refreshing!!
11. Try a food I’ve never had before.
This is actually quite a hard challenge given that I'll pretty much try anything once. I'd had squid, frogs, deer, allsorts of meats, organs, seafood, fruits. So anyway I tried some dragonfruit for the first time. It was alright tbh, not amazing but not horrible.

12. Try a cocktail I’ve never had before.
I ended up in Djangoes Riff a few weeks ago. Contrary to most peoples opinions, I don't like Django's. Its not my sort of music. Its expensive. And I've had one to many experiences of accidently ordering a cocktail containing milk and ending up spewing it out my nose. However, I ordered a 'Hello Sailor' and actually enjoyed it so I suppose my experience has improved somewhat. I do intend to go to Wetherspoons soon though and try a Cherry Orchard; apple and cherry sourz with lemonade and something else... sounds nice!!


15. Start writing letters to the friends and family I never see.
Not quite writing; but I have started regularly emailing and Skyping family over in Ireland, Spain and Australia. In the emails I try and include pictures too, since the last time some of my family saw me I was much younger.
22. Get in touch with someone you used to be close to but who’s become a stranger.
Facebook is the king of doing this. As well as using it to speak to my actual current friends, I try make a point of writing on old friends walls, seeing what they're up to and making a point of letting them know when I'm going out so if they're out we can meet up. I think looking at some other people its kind of sad what happens, people who you once used to hug goodbye everyday at school, but now if you walked past them on the street you wouldn't even acknowledge them. I guess in some ways its human nature but it is still upsetting.
28. Every week put £2 in a pot. Don’t spend the money until there’s something I really want.
Ok so I've only started doing this more recently but it's getting there. I think I either want a DSLR camera; or a keyboard. Practically I think a camera would be better, takes up less space and I'd probably get more use out of it, but I'll wait til I've actually collected a fair amount before deciding, and you never know by then I might want something else anyway!


35. Throw Jake an amazing 21st, make sure he has a great night.
Jake's 21st was a good night, and as far as I'm aware he did enjoy it. He was very drunk (and very hungover the next day) ... but all his friends and family came, and he seemed to have a good night.

And how come it's so hard?

It's not always easy,
And sometimes life can be deceiving,
I'll tell you one thing, it’s always better when we're together.


Have you ever noticed how human’s strive for perfection? It’s pretty much the main goal in life to achieve perfection in all aspects. But is this really a sensible goal? I can’t really judge too much because I guess up until recently this was my ambition too. Perfection.

Thinking about it though. There’s no such thing. Even the world’s greatest lovers have tiffs. The most implacably behaved children have tantrums. The sun isn’t always shining. Infinite amounts money can’t buy everything. The cleverest man in the world still gets the answers wrong sometimes.

Perfection doesn’t exist. And honestly, thinking about it. If it did, it would be the most boring, monotonous thing ever. Anyone who disagrees with me by the way, either thinks it’s worth striving for, or think maybe you’ve achieved perfection; feel free to comment. I’m pretty curious.

The best I can hope for is happiness most of the time, but knowing it’s ok for things to go wrong sometimes. In fact sometimes its better when they do. Couples come out stronger when they get through a fight. Tantrum children learn to be extrovert. The rain helps the grass grow greener.... and getting the answer wrong means you can learn your mistake, and rectify it next time.

I guess thinking about it, as perfection goes, my life isn’t too bad. Sure I have my fair share of problems, virtually no money whatsoever. I get more than the occasional answer wrong. And unfortunately in England its nearly always raining. But in terms of people, I have some truly great ones around me, friends who mean the world to me, and a boy who I truly hope is the one I’m supposed to spend the rest of my life with ... whether we have the occasional spat or not.